The One Liners #229

Irony: OJ makes Fred Goldman’s license plates.

The Supreme Court said that terror suspects couldn’t be held indefinitely.
Said the Justices, “They’re going to die, someday.”

Sales of computers have dropped off so much;
Apple stores are considering selling apples.

My boss revealed that he only had a month to live.
Immediately, I entered my vacation requests.

My wife never believes my threats. When I say that I’m walking out on her,
she always asks me to pick up some milk and bread while I’m out.

While Honda executives have pulled out of Formula One Racing,
they continue to use Grecian Formula.

I thought that my steak was going to be a little too rare
when the waiter said that he had to go out and milk it first.

I asked my boss to give me some slack,
so he handed me his pants.

An Atheist told me, “God didn’t make little green apples”.

Ford said that the rumor of discontinuing Mercury was pure mythology.

Run it slow, Advice from Joe