The One Liners #76

When President Bush was told that he was a lame duck,
he asked if his insurance covered that.

When Laura Bush was asked what she’s going to do when W’s term is over, she said,
“Run for senator of some state, I guess.”

To pressure Saudi Arabia to increase oil production,
the US has threatened to hold back shipments of Camel cigarettes.

To solve the New Orleans problem before he leaves office, President Bush has arraigned a meeting between Mayor Ray Nagin and Katrinia.

To counter claims by McCain that he’s inexperienced, Obama asked Hillary what it was that she was going to do on that first day in office.

The Mars probe confirmed that the white substance they’ve been finding is cocaine.

In a related story, scores of rock stars have signed up to become astronauts.

Legendary Lance Armstrong admitted today that his bike tires were filled with helium.
“You knew that it had to be something!” laughed Armstrong in a high pitched voice.

Legendary Pacman Jones announced that he wants to drop his nickname and be known by his given name. All broadcasters are now asked to refer to him as Indiana Jones.

Call him slow, Advice from Joe