The One Liners #107

I found a way to keep from being thrown out of restaurants.
Eat outside.

If a smoke free restaurant catches fire, how would you know?

They found out why John Muir hiked so much.
His wife wouldn’t let him smoke in the house.

Lewis once said to Clarke, “Why didn’t we take Interstate 80?”

Why didn’t Count Basie use an adding machine?

There is an impending crisis in the world of comedy.
Starting in January, comedians will no longer be allowed to use monologs on TV.
“I’m working on some digitallogs right now,” said former comedian Joe Dyson.

Budget cuts may cause delays on sending man back to the moon.
This could affect the president’s goal of drilling into the moon by 2012.

I found out why my father would never look at me.
His mother told him to never look at the son.

Rioters are being affected by the high cost of gas.
Have you seen the price of Molotov Cocktails lately?

Heath Ledger had a good reason for never serving in the military.
He didn’t want to be known as General Ledger.

Explain it slow, Advice from Joe