The One Liners #109

If you join AA and you fail,
are you automatically entered into FF?

Judge Judy found last week’s earthquake, guilty!

Legendary Country Joe and the Fish were in this year’s spelling bee.
When they gave him the first word to spell, Joe said,
“Give me an F! Give me a U! Give me a….”

You know, I’m getting used to paying more for gas,
and having no life.

I wanted to play arena football,
but my wife won’t let me play with the ball in the house.

If you’re taken ill,
do you have to call in sick to your health club?

I wanted to go out for little league this year.
Unfortunately they only take little kids, not little adults.

Did legendary Mark Spitz ever chew tobacco?

My barber says that my hair is getting so thin that it’s anorexic.

One way to bring the troops home quickly would be to declare them all citizens of Iraq.

I have a friend who is redundant.
And he says that if he had to do it all over again, he’d do it exactly the same way.

Repeat it slow, Advice from Joe