The One Liners #139

Wal-Mart is fighting a San Francisco ban on selling cigarettes in pharmacies.
The chain claims that most of their pharmacists smoke.

I stopped smoking when I started wearing the patch.
Did you know, those patches are fireproof?

If I use one of those agencies that can reduce or eliminate my credit card debit,
do I have to return the big screen TV?

Hillary has accused Sarah Palin of identity theft.

I wasn’t the only one to think that Jethro Tull was a country singer, right?

Everybody remembers Jimi Hendrex playing The National Anthem,
but nobody remember who won the game.

They want to build a statue of Muddy Waters in New Orleans.

Phil Collins silenced rumors that he was going to reunite with Genesis.
He’s simply reading a collection of religious books.

Members of The Red Hot Chili Peppers were infected with Salmonella today.
The Chili Peppers have no idea what could have caused it.

The high price of gas has slowed sales of CDs by REO Speedwagon.

Drive it slow, Advice from Joe