The One Liners #218

Fewer females are getting breast enhancements,
which is affecting Silicon Valley.

Jobs may be slashed, as the Knife industry is facing cuts.
In a related story, sales of Band-Aids have soared.

I’m not a rubbernecker. There was a dresser on the freeway and I didn’t look.
Now, if she was undressing, that would have been a different story.

After all these years, I finally got a flat tire. Doing all those sit-ups really helped.

My book has made the Top Ten list.
Now, it’s my tenth favorite book.

I own a Corinthian Leather jacket.
It’s made out of a ’78 Cordoba.

CitiBank is using a Gene Pitney song in a new advertising campaign.
“It isn’t very pretty what a town without Citi can do.”

Barry Manalow has released a new album called, “Hits for People in their Eighties”

I can’t believe that Burress accidently shot himself.
I thought that Plaxico was bullet proof.

I was going to become a prison guard,
but I didn’t want an inside job.

Serve it slow, Advice from Joe