The One Liners #232

I joined Classmates.com and found out exactly how many people that I didn’t know.

Truck drivers have those signs on their trailers:
“If you can’t see my mirrors, then I can’t flick you off”

Everybody in my family sweats a lot.
I have high relative humidity.

I’m having a rough time, financially.
I invested in a sand paper company.

Goodbye parties for laid-off employees are always sad.
Especially when you’re “the jolly good fellow”.

Math scores are up for the nations school students. Improvements were made for forty percent of the fourth graders and seventeen percent of the eighth graders for a total of three hundred and seventy percent of all students in the twelfth grade by a two to one margin… give or take.

Reports say that Fannie Mae made non-prime loans to buy non-prime beef.

My incontinent uncle would go to the bathroom in places that he shouldn’t.
He would void where prohibited.

Global cancer deaths may double by 2030. This has prompted fear that the rate could quadruple by 4060.

Double it slow, Advice from Joe